Tuesday, March 16, 2010

A list of things which become suddenly dangerous when combined with Delhi's electricity delivery systems

 - Refrigerator.  You think your yogurt has been kept a continuous temperature.  It has.  It's been ninety degrees all afternoon.
 - Automatic kettle.  The kettle switching off does not mean the water has boiled.  It could mean it's been zapped by a power surge at an inopportune moment.  Your water isn't sanitary.  Enjoy your Delhi-belly.
 - Laptop charger.  Imagine lying in bed one night, half-asleep, when you hear a small "pop" and see a flash of light.  For one bleary moment, you think someone has taken a picture using one of those old-timey camera flashes.  You then realize that you're in your hotel, alone, and that pop and flash had just come from your wall socket.  From the plug leading to your laptop.  You now have a ruined night's sleep, and a ruined hard drive.
 - Alarm clock.  If yours plugs into the wall, you will wake up to blinking 12:00 12:00 12:00 at least once a week.  In this situation, check your watch: it will be invariably be half an hour after you were supposed to report to work.  Enjoy the traffic.
 - Mosquito zapper.  Just when you thought it was safe to sleep in a t-shirt and shorts... now you're itchy and you've got malaria.
 - Treadmill.  Not only does the treadmill timer run a good thirty seconds slow, power shocks and surges mean that, sometimes, your runs go like this:  run run run run run run run run run... run. ... ruuuunnn.... ruuu- RUNRUNRUNRUNRUNRUN! run run run run. Ruuuuuuuu- RUN!

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